Memo to Unemployed Nigerian Graduates: Embrace Abnormality.

Having graduated from the university as a mechanical engineer, Adaka had trekked the entire length and breadth of Port Harcourt’s Trans-Amadi Industrial Estate in search of a job to no avail. At the last count, he felt his curriculum vitae (which only had his industrial training of six months as the only working experience) had graced almost every receptionist’s inbound tray in all the companies there. His uncles who had promised him jobs after school came up with many excuses or at least told him he would be contacted if anything came up. Three years down the line, no call from any uncle had graced his cell phone.

One Sunday morning, some Bible-clutching folks had come to preach to him. They listened to him as he narrated his woes and came to a conclusion. “What is happening to you is not normal. You need prayers,” they said. So Adaka prayed and fasted in the hope of breaking the spell of doom from the village and yet the sky was still dark as haunted cave.

Broke and flustered, Adaka decided not to think like a normal graduate. He decided to drive a taxi. He printed business cards with some money a friend of his casually threw at him during a party, and shaped up the few nice shirts he had and set to work, driving one of his uncle’s fairly used Toyota Carina which he willingly gave to him, at least to show his hospitality to a struggling young man.

Adaka hit the streets, driving his taxi with glee, handing out his business cards to mothers who needed kids to be dropped at school, business men who needed drops at the airport or to be waited upon at functions. Nine months later, Adaka had three mini-Hiace buses, his own office and was planning to wed his girlfriend of five years!

A normal Nigerian graduate in our times is the one who thinks the money comes from working in an oil company and going to offshore rigs even if he or she studied Shorthand as a course.

A normal graduate is the one who thinks mechanics are lesser beings.

A normal Nigerian graduate is the one who thinks business is just buying and selling and it is for brains that couldn't withstand the rigours of academic labours and so decided to do boy-boyapprenticeship.

A normal Nigerian graduate is the one who thinks sitting in an air conditioned office is a mark of success and prestige. He or she thinks the connection to success only lies in the fat hands of Aso Rock or House of Assembly occupants and so they press for their signatures in exchange for a few romps in classy hotels.

A normal Nigerian graduate is the one who thinks being a politician is the passport to financial prosperity for his next ten generations.

A normal Nigerian graduate is the one who wants his salary to start at N500, 000 per month, probably as a compensation for the many months JAMB, ASUU and NYSC connived like thieves to make them lose productive portions of their lives.

A normal Nigerian graduate is the one who sees a marked demarcation between what is studied in school and how talents and passions can add value to humanity and in turn foster financial posterity.

So a Nigerian graduate who graduated from a Nigerian university thinks the way a normal Nigerian graduate thinks and also does what every other normal Nigerian graduate does – give up and stay home, cry about the government’s wickedness, feed off uncles, relations and parents who pity him while waiting for that manna to just fall.

When all else fails, he resorts to attending all-night vigils in many churches, having been convinced by normal thinking Bible clutching religious blokes who tell him “You need spiritual deliverance from demonic powers from your village.” In the hope of a providential divine stroke of luck, he panders to their whims.

Many Nigerian graduates do not realise that it gets to a point where they have to look away from the usual norms and do what may seem unpalatable to many but has the potential to become a global enterprise. They don’t just think of looking within to that God given intrinsic value that can provide opportunities for them to bless lives and be blessed in return. They just don’t think of looking at their vicinity and devising means to dispose neighbours’ refuse for a fee. They just don’t think of driving a taxi and putting creative edges to it. They don’t think of developing apps on their borrowed laptops even when they studied computer engineering. They don’t think of making grandma’s goats reproduce many kids they can eventually groom and then sell and expand. There are so many ways not to think normal but the normal Nigerian graduate has a problem with abnormality.

That’s why normal things happen to normal Nigerian graduates in Nigeria.

Written by Emeka Nobis & Culled from thescoopng.
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